Derby County's Scottish midfield player Bob Malcolm, on loan at Queen’s Park Rangers at the time of the incident, parked his car in the middle lane of the M1 and fell asleep. He explained that be had been “overtaken by tiredness” after drinking with friends and agreeing to drop them off after they failed to find taxis. He thought he had pulled over onto the hard shoulder. The driver of a recovery vehicle found him slumped over the wheel of his silver Range Rover and had to wake him up before calling the police.

Malcolm accepted that he had made a grievous mistake and apologized to supporters on QPR's website. He admitted that he had set a bad example to the club’s young fans but then added “But I must say that I was very upset and frustrated with the poor performance of the referee in our match at Plymouth the night before (the incident)”. He has subsequently been banned from driving for 20 months and fined £750.

DUI or RIP?

But Malcolm’s bizarre reasoning doesn’t come close to the excuse given by a man from Blackburn desperate to avoid a drink driving charge. Shafkat Munir tried to fake his own death to avoid three speeding charges was caught when police recognised him from a speed camera image. He was concerned that being banned from driving could cost him his job as a waiter.

Munir initially accepted he was the driver of a Honda Civic caught speeding on three occasions. But he later sent a death certificate, written in Urdu, to both police in Yorkshire and Lancashire forces, claiming that a 'Shafkat Munir' had actually died four years previously. The 26-year-old was jailed for 12 months after admitting three offences of attempting to pervert the course of justice at an earlier court hearing.